story of -=K=- :: part 39
But even though K felt all these... he didn't change.. he was still the same old K... the same K that treated T in the same way all along... If T had forgiven him that time... I can tell u that K will still be the same person.. he will never change. People never change until something serious happens. For the week after K met T... he was still the same K.. there was no change in him. If T had gone back to him then.. she would stll suffer.. she wll not find real happiness. T was in pain.. she needed to relieve it...
what did K do to relieve his pain? K went to drink... went out with friends.. and spent money... but all to no avail, he still felt as painful as it is... K drinks to feel happy temporarily... but after that, reality still seeks in.... But by the time he realises it, it was too late... he had spent every bit of his money left.
K chatted with many friends... to ease the sadness... K had the same characteristic as T.. they were both dependent and insecure ppl... So K had to depend on his friends to console him.. But the hurt and pain that he had was not that easy for anyone to just say a few words and he would be ok.
K told his friend... one of his guy friends who had a gf just like he and T, he told him" hey, me and T had broken up... I really cannot go on with my life.." and u know what his friend said? His friend said.. " break break lah, hack care lor. What can u do? Find someone else." It was so short, but it meant a lot to K. K thought... what could he do? It was T who didn't want him anymore.. what can he do to change that? T wanted to enjoy herself and not be stuck with me... what can I do to change that?
It became worse for K. K knew that now... he could do nothing and just live with the cruel fact. K didn't know that was all untrue... If he had changed and went to look for T and ask her for her forgiveness.. he would have succeeded. But no, he didn't do that. He thought.. " if it was T who changed heart, no matter what I do... I would never succeed..." and he gave up... K didn't trust that T loved him then. Why would he trust that? No way.. T was the one who didn't want to respond to him anymore... love is very meaningful. K had came across this phrase in the mindef forums.. that say..
" Love is patient.. Love is kind.. It does not envy, it does not brag, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hope, always persevere. Love never fails."
K was weak... he is not patient, he is proud, he is rude, he is easily angered, he keeps records of wrongs, and he didn't trust that T loved him. He kept thinking that T didn't want him anymore... he didn't know that he and T had love... K never ever trusted himself that T really loved him with her heart and soul.... He was not fit to say that he love T....
What about T? she was patient with K.. she gave K lots of chances.. she was kind to K... she always tried her best to make K happy... She is not proud, and she would rather herself fail than to break up with K.. so she is not self seeking.. T is not easily angered... Everytime K did something wrong... she would not get angry as often as when T did something wrong... She managed to do many things that fulfiled the phrase... But what did K manage to do? Barely a few. And K still had the cheek to tell her that she don't love him... How that must have felt....
On the side of T, how did she get through the times? She went out.. went out and went out... she spent everyday to go out... she didn't want to stay at home and think about the horrible thing that happened.. T needed someone to take care of her... T needed someone to support her just like K was needing his friends. But no matter how her friends or his friends were there for them, the pain that both of them felt was too deep to be eased simply.
T started to go out with a guy who asked her out... She began to feel loved and cared... she was having those stuff that K never gave her for so long...care, concern, love, support, encouragement... she had all these in her darkest hour.. from this guy..This guy managed to show T that he was the one that could really take care of her... unlike K, who were so lacking in the other areas of love like security, care.. etc.. This person.. had all these... T was happy that there was this person who had all that she needed for so long.. T didn't need hurt, T didn't need pain. T didn't need to suffer for K. T's shattered heart was struggling to live on... She could not love that easily anymore... she didn't want to suffer the feeling of giving and givng and getting nothing in return...
And now.. this person.. was someone who was ready to give ... It is always happier to be loved than love others. T can feel this guy's sincerity and love.. it was just like what she did to K last time... She gave.. and now.. he gave...
what did K do to relieve his pain? K went to drink... went out with friends.. and spent money... but all to no avail, he still felt as painful as it is... K drinks to feel happy temporarily... but after that, reality still seeks in.... But by the time he realises it, it was too late... he had spent every bit of his money left.
K chatted with many friends... to ease the sadness... K had the same characteristic as T.. they were both dependent and insecure ppl... So K had to depend on his friends to console him.. But the hurt and pain that he had was not that easy for anyone to just say a few words and he would be ok.
K told his friend... one of his guy friends who had a gf just like he and T, he told him" hey, me and T had broken up... I really cannot go on with my life.." and u know what his friend said? His friend said.. " break break lah, hack care lor. What can u do? Find someone else." It was so short, but it meant a lot to K. K thought... what could he do? It was T who didn't want him anymore.. what can he do to change that? T wanted to enjoy herself and not be stuck with me... what can I do to change that?
It became worse for K. K knew that now... he could do nothing and just live with the cruel fact. K didn't know that was all untrue... If he had changed and went to look for T and ask her for her forgiveness.. he would have succeeded. But no, he didn't do that. He thought.. " if it was T who changed heart, no matter what I do... I would never succeed..." and he gave up... K didn't trust that T loved him then. Why would he trust that? No way.. T was the one who didn't want to respond to him anymore... love is very meaningful. K had came across this phrase in the mindef forums.. that say..
" Love is patient.. Love is kind.. It does not envy, it does not brag, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hope, always persevere. Love never fails."
K was weak... he is not patient, he is proud, he is rude, he is easily angered, he keeps records of wrongs, and he didn't trust that T loved him. He kept thinking that T didn't want him anymore... he didn't know that he and T had love... K never ever trusted himself that T really loved him with her heart and soul.... He was not fit to say that he love T....
What about T? she was patient with K.. she gave K lots of chances.. she was kind to K... she always tried her best to make K happy... She is not proud, and she would rather herself fail than to break up with K.. so she is not self seeking.. T is not easily angered... Everytime K did something wrong... she would not get angry as often as when T did something wrong... She managed to do many things that fulfiled the phrase... But what did K manage to do? Barely a few. And K still had the cheek to tell her that she don't love him... How that must have felt....
On the side of T, how did she get through the times? She went out.. went out and went out... she spent everyday to go out... she didn't want to stay at home and think about the horrible thing that happened.. T needed someone to take care of her... T needed someone to support her just like K was needing his friends. But no matter how her friends or his friends were there for them, the pain that both of them felt was too deep to be eased simply.
T started to go out with a guy who asked her out... She began to feel loved and cared... she was having those stuff that K never gave her for so long...care, concern, love, support, encouragement... she had all these in her darkest hour.. from this guy..This guy managed to show T that he was the one that could really take care of her... unlike K, who were so lacking in the other areas of love like security, care.. etc.. This person.. had all these... T was happy that there was this person who had all that she needed for so long.. T didn't need hurt, T didn't need pain. T didn't need to suffer for K. T's shattered heart was struggling to live on... She could not love that easily anymore... she didn't want to suffer the feeling of giving and givng and getting nothing in return...
And now.. this person.. was someone who was ready to give ... It is always happier to be loved than love others. T can feel this guy's sincerity and love.. it was just like what she did to K last time... She gave.. and now.. he gave...
recorded @
00:14
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